A Matchless Woman isn’t afraid of her dark side. She embraces all of herself and gets better over time. Somedays, I am on my Drake, and my approach to conflict becomes, (“aww well F*** em dog, we gon see how hard they ride”). As a lawyer, sometimes we have to pull the trigger and then figure out the rest later. It’s a real thing. Yesterday, I spoke about the importance of knowing who you are and the significant role that plays in you living a successful life. Note that I only listed qualities that I perceive as my strengths. (see that November 29th post on my Facebook page here)
Nevertheless, to be successful, you must also know your “shadow” side or your weaknesses. You need to know when you’ve followed that shadow side so far down its path that you’re now in the territory of moral and character failure or even worse, death. If you’re too young to know what my previous statement means…just keep living. You will find yourself in situations that press upon your areas of weakness so heavy that you fall, a lot.
Falling and failure is a part of our human nature. Very often, we fall because we have real needs that have not been met (that’s another lesson for another long post lol). I’ve learned that while some falls can be very costly to your life, it’s more important that you learn the lessons from your falls. When you do this, you will come back stronger and often more capable as a leader. You often get introduced to your shadow side when you lose control of your strengths.
My shadow side is real. My assertive nature can easily turn into aggression and bullying. My courage can quickly turn into overstepping the will of others. In sum, I’ve learned not to be afraid of my shadow side. As a leader, you have to confront the ugliest parts of yourself, or else those parts will rear their ugly little heads at the most inconvenient times. It’s costly to learn self-control. However, I’ve tested the following statement, and I’ve found it to be right in most cases…when you choose to be cheap and not invest in learning to control your weaknesses and character failures, then you pay a heavy price on the other side. A Matchless Woman isn’t afraid of her dark side. She embraces all of herself.